Operation Little Blue Romper

My brother's in law girlfriend is four years younger than me. She has two beautiful kids, which are a year and a half apart. He got her pregnant after going out only for a year, pretty sure by accident. Not that I was keeping tabs or anything. Whatever. She has had both her sons in the same time frame in which I have been actively trying to get pregnant. Lovely, really. So many fun times, I couldn't even begin to tell you! (OK, I could, but then I wouldn't be able to stop).

Anyway, I don't know why I remembered this today. Maybe because it is such a small but yet such a powerful memory for me. The story goes as follows... A and I were visiting his brother one day when said girlfriend was pregnant with their first son. Suddenly, she came out excitedly to show me something. It was a little blue romper. Cute, I thought. The horror came afterwards when she told me whose romper that was. As it turns out, my mother in law was giving away A's baby clothes to her? Fuck my life! Not to appear selfish, but yeah, it is what it is. When you are in that mental place, shit like this can throw you into a hissy fit. I wanted to say and do so many things, but I just nodded and smiled... just like I've done a million times after that.

First of all (as seen in my ragey infertile mind) wasn't my mother in law supposed to be giving away the other son's baby clothes? You know, the clothes from the one who knocked her up?! But no, she decided to give her A's clothes. This was a kick to my guts. A kick to my self esteem. As if she knew not to hold on to those clothes, because I wasn't going to get pregnant anytime soon. Well, she was right after all. It has been three years, and well... you know the rest. 

That little blue romper has haunted me ever since. So that's why today, I've decided to steal it back from her, if I ever get pregnant again someday (even if it is a girl, I will put her in that damn blue romper) because, yes. And if I don't get pregnant, I am going to still get it back and dress my doggie in it!